Much Later
by LookCloser2
Summary: When Nathan left, Lucas helped Haley to move on. But now Haley is gone and has left Lucas behind. Years later, Jamie helps Lucas to confront his feelings and learn how to let go. Suggestion of Laley, lots of Uncle-Nephew interaction.
1. At the Cemetery

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**Much Later: Prologue**

Almost thirty years had passed before he realized his mistake and by then it was too late. I really did love you, he whispered into the chilly November air. He knew his words didn't matter now, not anymore. A gust of wind stirred up the fallen leaves and they twirled around and around, as though trying to find their way. He remembered the old Dylan song and hummed it to himself as though it were comforting. A man on the path glanced over at him standing still beneath the tree, before wrapping his coat around him tighter to keep out the wind and hurrying on his way. What happened to us, he asked her, but her answer didn't come. He hadn't really expected it to, but a part of him had been hoping one might.


	2. Losing Haley

He remembered that day, the day their lives had begun to fall apart, as though it were yesterday. "Luke?' she'd asked on the phone, and he could tell right away that she'd been crying. They had met at the elementary school playground where they had first met many years before.

"_What's your name?" demanded a bossy seven year old girl to the boy on the swings. Her hands were on her hips and her long, chestnut locks were pulled into two pigtails. The blonde boy on the swings looked up._

"_I'm Lucas," he whispered shyly._

"_My name is Haley." She sat down next to him on the swing. Together, they swung higher and higher until, in a moment of childlike courage, Lucas let go of the swing and went flying through the air. He landed on his hands and knees in the sand._

"_Come on!" he grinned at the little girl._

"_I'm scared," she whispered, and Lucas smiled._

"_Don't worry. I'm right here. I won't let anything happen to you."Closing her eyes tightly, Haley too let go of the swing and flew through the air._

She was already swinging on the swings when he walked up to her. Her eyes were puffy and her cheeks were stained with dried tears. Lucas sat down on a swing beside her, silently.

After a few moments of comforting each other with their presence, Haley burst out, "He's gone, Luke!" She burst into tears, not for the first time, Lucas knew.

Hey, hey," Lucas soothed, reaching over to pull her swing closer and to rub her back. "Who's gone, Hales?"

"Na-Nathan. He's g-gone." She hiccupped as she sobbed.

"Why? What happened?" His voice betrayed both the sympathy he felt for Haley's desperation and the anger he felt towards Nathan for leaving her.

"I told him…" she paused, looked up at him. "I told him I was pregnant."

Lucas' hand froze on her back. "And are you," he questioned softly. "Is it true?"

She nodded, looked down, her tears threatening to start again. Gently, he lifted her chin, stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Hey, hey. It's all right. Okay? I'm here for you, Hales. I'll always be here for you."

Lucas knew right then how much he loved her. But he didn't know what it meant, and so he didn't say anything. When they found out several months later that Nathan had been in a car accident and died, he knew it wasn't the right time to mention it either. The paramedics found the sonogram Haley had sent in the front seat of Nathan's car. He had been on his way home for Haley and the baby. Listening to Haley's sobs, it was almost worse than when Nathan had left her – he had tried to come home, and he hadn't made it.

***********************

Five years later, Lucas stood with Haley as she tried on wedding dresses. She had met John in college and he had proposed just after graduation.

"What do you think of this one, Lucas?" Haley asked, twirling around in a dress.

"You look beautiful, Mama," declared little Jamie, Haley and Nathan's son. "Doesn't she, Uncle Lucas?"

"She sure does, J. Luke," replied Lucas softly. "You look beautiful, Hales." He almost spoke up right then, almost told her how it made him feel to see her in that gown. He almost said that she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen and he'd loved her since that first day on the playground. But the words caught in his throat.

"Can you believe I'm getting married?" squealed Haley, and the look on the face was pure joy. She had been happier these last few years with John than he'd ever seen her since Nathan died. And then Lucas remembered why he couldn't tell her the truth, couldn't love her as anything more than as a younger sister. She was finally happy again, happier than she'd been in a long time, and that, truly, was all he really wanted for her.

"Luke. Luke!" said Haley, breaking him out of his thoughts. "You know I couldn't have done it these last few years without you, right?"

He smiled at her, his eyes betraying his sadness, but she was too overjoyed to see it. "Yeah, I know. His face changed, grew cheerful, happy again because she was happy again. "I wouldn't have missed them for the world."

***********************

The night Jamie called John "Daddy" was the first night Lucas allowed himself to cry over what he had lost. The day Haley called and said they were moving to California for John's new job, it broke his heart. Over the years they slowly lost contact, their daily phone calls and weekly letters reduced to a holiday card in the mail at Christmastime.

The year Jamie was turning seventeen, Lucas got a call from a lawyer. He knew it was almost Jamie's birthday because the date was marked on his calendar, circled in red ink. He had been thinking about going out to California as a surprise for Jamie, but he was still working up the nerve to call Haley and ask if that would be okay.

"Lucas Scott?" the lawyer demanded, his voice brisk and professional.

"This is he," replied Lucas, trying to decide what to have for lunch. He could smell the tuna fish sandwiches from his office, but he was really in the mood for a hot slice of pizza.

"My name is Will Thompson. I believe you knew a Haley and John Chesterfield?"

It was Haley's name that drew Luke's attention from his rumbling stomach to the man on the telephone. "Yes – yes I know her." He paused, wanted to ask why the man had used the past tense, but the lawyer spoke up again.

"I was the Chesterfield's lawyer and I am the executor of their will."

"Will?" repeated Lucas, dazed, his hunger forgotten.

"Yes?" replied the lawyer.

"No – I mean…" Lucas closed his eyes to prevent the tears from falling. "What – what happened?"

"Ah, I take it you don't know?" questioned Will Thompson. He continued on, reading in a monotone a write-up from his records. "Mr. and Mrs. Chesterfield were on their way to a party when their car was struck by a drunk driver. Both were declared dead at the scene. Neighbors stayed at the house with the children and a Mrs. Beatte stayed the night with them. I was notified yesterday morning, the day after the accident." Lucas listened in a stunned silence, the tears now running silently down his cheeks, his eyes still squeezed shut.

"And –" Lucas' voice broke on the word and he gulped before continuing. "And the children are all alright? They weren't with them?" He couldn't say Haley's name, or even John's.

"Rebecca, Molly and Jamie are fine. They are with their parents' friends at the moment. They've been told there was an accident, but that's all they know right now."

"They don't know?" Lucas burst out, outraged. "Their parents have been dead for almost two days, and nobody has told them yet?"

"Well, that's why I'm calling, Mr. Scott," replied the lawyer, unfazed. "The policy is to let their appointed guardians tell them the news. We find it is easier on the children to hear it from a trusted, loved one. This brings me to my next point. Mr. Scott, you have been appointed the sole guardian of the three children."


	3. Familiar Strangers

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Lucas sat on the plane with his ticket to California in his hand. Just a few days ago, it would have meant going to see Haley again, celebrating Jamie turning seventeen, almost a man. Now the ticket held the stigma of Haley's death, the anxiety of having three children he barely remembered, that barely remembered him, looking for him to tell them everything would be okay again. He knew that was impossible. Nothing would ever be the same, for any of them. So he braced himself for the moment he would have to look in their young, heartbroken eyes and begin a new life based on a lie. "Everything will be okay," he whispered to himself. The man in the seat beside him gave him a strange look, and Lucas turned to stare out the window. The city lights below blurred with his tears.

They were standing by the baggage claim when he first saw them. Jamie was tall; he was probably a good ball player. The little girls were the spitting image of Haley as a child. A short, middle-aged lady was standing with them and she smiled and waved. The children followed slowly as she walked to greet him, the youngest girl clutching Jamie's hand tightly. The woman turned then, looked at the children, spoke in a falsely cheery voice. "All right, then," she said. "Kids, your Uncle Lucas is here to stay with you for a little while. Can you all say hi?"

Lucas watched them and saw Jamie's brow furrow, then straighten. Lucas knew he resented being treated like a child, but was staying strong for his sisters.

"Mrs. Beattie," whispered the little girl, tugging on the bottom of the woman's shirt. "Where are Mama and Daddy? Don't they want to see Uncle Lucas?"

Jamie looked down sharply at his youngest sister. "Mama and Daddy got in an accident, remember, Molly? That's why Uncle Lucas is here. He's going to take care of us until we see Mama and Daddy again." Lucas studied the boy as he reassured his little sister and confirmed what he already knew. Jamie was just as smart and as quick as he had been when he was four. His sisters may not have understood what was going on, but Jamie did. He knew exactly what had happened to his parents and just how long it would be before they saw them again.

"Well then," Mrs. Beattie spoke up again, in that cheery voice that Lucas was beginning to hate. It must have been driving Jamie insane. "Luke, this is Rebecca, Molly, and of course you know Jamie." She pointed to each of the children in turn. Lucas nodded, smiled, shook hands with Jamie. Mrs. Beattie took charge, collected Lucas' luggage and led them to the car. Lucas followed docilely, amazed at the leadership of this stout woman and thankful that he didn't have to be the one with all the answers quite yet.

***********************

Lucas slept in the guest bedroom that night at Haley's house. Mrs. Beattie had stayed through dinner and bedtime and promised to come back the next day. Now, Lucas lay awake. The room was too hot, even with the window open. He wondered how Haley, who had loved snow and winter, had stood this warm, Californian weather for so long. A whimper broke through his thoughts, the soft sobs quickly turning into full-fledged crying. The sound was coming from Molly's room.

The door was slightly ajar when he got there and he could see Jamie's figure crouched by the head of the four-year old's bed. He was whispering to her and rubbing her back, the same way Lucas had for Haley when Nathan had died all those years ago. Jamie glanced up as Lucas approached.

"Hi," Jamie whispered.

"Hi," replied Lucas, softly.

"She misses Mama. Don't worry, I'll stay with her tonight." Lucas nodded, amazed at the maturity of the sixteen year old. Then again, this was Haley's son he was thinking about. Lucas turned and walked out of the room. As he pulled the door shut behind him, he saw Jamie climbing into Molly's bed and pulling his little sister in close to his chest. He reminded Lucas so much of Haley that it hurt, but he was glad to have a piece – or three – of her left.

***********************

Jamie and Rebecca were slurping cereal in the kitchen when Lucas woke up the next morning. They were perched on tall stools lifting them up to the counter table.

Jamie looked up at Lucas. "Molly's watching cartoons in the den. I made her some eggs."

"You know how to make –"

Jamie's brow furrowed.

"Right…Haley's kid." Muttered Lucas to himself. "Jamie," Lucas paused. "I think…We should talk."

Jamie studied him carefully before giving a quick nod in acknowledgment and agreement. "Rebecca," he spoke, his eyes still trained on Lucas', "Go help Molly get dressed and take her outside to play. And tell her she can't wear her dress-up princess dress out of the house again. She knows that Mama…" Jamie gulped and glanced at Rebecca. "Just get her dressed please, Rebecca." The younger child nodded dutifully and left the room.

"James." Lucas stopped. He couldn't get any further. Jamie watched him silently, waiting for Luke to make the first move. He sat, swallowed, started again. "Your parents…they –"

"Don't say it." Jamie broke in.

Lucas sighed. "You can't pretend it didn't happen, J. Luke."

"Stop calling me that!" screamed Jamie, every ounce a young, moody teenager. Lucas was taken aback.

"? I've always called you that. Your whole life."

"You mean in the birthday cards you send once a year? Or the name scrawled on the tag of a Christmas present? You may have some idealistic memory of a five year old kid that thought his uncle was his hero, but that's not me anymore. Molly and Rebecca don't even know you. I barely remember you. I don't know why my parents –" he stopped his tirade, unsure.

"Why what, Jamie?"

"Why they gave us to you!" Jamie burst out, frustrated.

Lucas ran his hand through his hair as he thought. "Do you want to know the truth, Jamie?" he asked quietly. Jamie nodded slowly. "I don't know why, either. But you know what I do know?" He looked steadily into Jamie's pained, ice blue eyes. "I know that your mother was a very smart lady. And I know that she never did anything without weighing all the options first. So if she decided that you should come live with me, I'm sure that she had a reason, okay, Jamie?"

"Uncle Lucas?" whispered Jamie, staring at his hands fiddling in his lap.

"Yes, Jamie?"

"I guess it would be okay if you called me J. Luke."

"Okay." Lucas patted Jamie on the back and stood up. "Should we go check on your sisters, then?"


	4. Memories and Moving On

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The boxes were packed and the movers were loading them into the moving van. Lucas took one last walk through the empty house, looking for a sign to tell them he was doing the right thing. On the front porch, the wooden swing was swinging in the gentle breeze.

"_Lucas," stated Haley one summer evening. They were sophomores in high school, before Lucas had joined the Ravens, before Haley had started tutoring Nathan, before their world had changed forever._

_"Yeah, Hales?" asked Lucas, pushing the porch swing back and forth with his feet. Haley was resting her head against his shoulder and he had an arm wrapped around her. They were snuggled close, warm despite the cool, evening air of early September._

_"Don't you wish it could be like this forever? You and me, our own little team. Nothing will be able to stop us."_

_"I don't know, Hales. I think I'd get bored of you eventually." Lucas laughed, teasingly, and Haley backhanded him across his chest._

_"I just mean, us, Tree Hill. I wish we never have to grow up and leave. I don't know what I'd do without you here, beside me. If that's not too sappy, sorry." Haley chuckled._

_"Well then, I'll tell you what, Haley James. After college, when we're all grown up and have families of our own, we'll move back to Tree Hill and live right next door to each other. How does that sound?"_

_Haley smiled and snuggled closer. "That sounds good, Buddy. I think I'd like to raise my kids here, in Tree Hill."_

The memory blurred and when it came back into focus over two years had passed. Haley was sitting snuggled against Lucas on the same porch swing, but now she was many months pregnant and there was a ring on her finger.

_"Luke, tell me what you're thinking," Haley spoke softly. Her head was resting against Lucas' chest and she shifted to look up at him._

_"I'm thinking how crazy it is the turns our lives have taken. Who knew that two years ago, I'd have walked off the rivercourt and won the State Championship, or that you would be married and about to pop?"_

_"About to pop, maybe," said Haley wryly, "But I don't know about the married part anymore. I haven't heard from Nathan in almost seven months." There were tears in her eyes._

_"Don't worry, Hales. He'll come back to you. And if it takes him some time, well, we'll raise this kid together, you and me." He smiled and rested his hand on her stomach. Suddenly there was a small kick._

_"Do you feel that, Luke?" Haley whispered. "He knows it's you. You're going to be a great uncle, do you know that, Lucas? My son will be very lucky to have you in his life."_

Jamie's voice brought Lucas back to reality. "Are you ready to go, Uncle Luke?" he demanded. "Molly is in her carseat and everything's packed." Lucas nodded, blinking back any tears. It wouldn't do to let the children see him crying.

"Uncle Lucas," asked Rebecca, tugging on his arm. "Why do we have to move?"

Lucas sighed. He knew this question was coming, but he thought his choice was for the best. "We're going to live in the place where your Mama grew up, okay, Rebecca? That's where I live. It's by the beach and you can have your own room and I think that you are really going to like it. Your mama told me once that Tree Hill was her favorite place in the world."

"Why isn't Mama coming?" asked Rebecca, sadly.

It broke Lucas' heart to hear her question. Despite the many time he had explained it to her, she and Molly still didn't understand that their parents were gone. "Because she is in a special place now, called Heaven," Lucas reminded her gently. "But she is still watching you and every time you smile, it makes her smile too, okay?"

She clutched her teddy bear and gave him a timid, but real, smile. Her front two teeth were missing – a stage of growing up that already Haley hadn't gotten to see. It was the first of many events of her children's lives that Haley would miss out on. "Okay," said Rebecca.


	5. Caught

**The next chapter will be the last. I hope you all enjoyed my story and thank you to those who reviewed!**

They had been in town for a month when Jamie got invited to a party. He stumbled in the front door at two in the morning and promptly stumbled into the coat rack, sending it crashing to the ground. Luke strode in from the living room where he'd been pacing for the last three hours and flicked on the light. Jamie grimaced and put a hand up to his eyes.

"Jeez, Uncle Lucas," mumbled Jamie drunkenly. "You scared me."

"_I_ scared _you_? James Lucas Scott, do you have any idea what time it is?" Lucas demanded, furious.

"No," giggled Jamie, "But I think you're gonna tell me."

"It's two 'o clock in the morning, James! Now tell me what in the hell a sixteen –"

"Almost seventeen." Broke in Jamie.

"_Sixteen" _repeated Luke, "Year old is doing out until two in the morning!"

"Welllll," began Jamie, with a drawn out slur, "I was invited to this party, see, and it just ended. Come on, Uncle Luke, didn't you ever have fun when you were my age?"

Lucas frowned. Bar sluts named Nikki and various pool halls ran through his mind. He remembered taking Peyton upstairs at one party their senior year and getting caught making out with Brooke by his Uncle Keith. Yeah, Lucas realized, he really wasn't one to talk. And he found himself copying Keith when he finally spoke again to Jamie. "Go to bed, sleep it off. We'll talk about this in the morning."

Luke burst into Jamie's room at ten the following day and snapped up Jamie's window shades. "Up," he barked. "Time to talk, James."

Jamie pulled a pillow over his head and burrowed under the blankets. "Later, Luke," he groaned. "And close the curtains. The light is hurting my eyes."

Lucas laughed sardonically and shook his head. "Well that's your own damned fault then, isn't it Jamie? Now, get up. Your sisters have been up since six." With the briefest pang of guilt as he remembered his mother doing the same, Lucas ripped off Jamie's blankets, leaving him shivering in his boxers on the bed.

"What the hell?" argued Jamie, annoyed and hungover.

"Jamie. Now. Talk." Lucas' tone left no room for argument.

Grimacing, Jamie sat up. "Can you at least pull down the shades?" he asked, squinting. With a small amount of sympathy, Lucas agreed. Jamie sighed. "Thanks," he muttered. "It was just a party, Uncle Lucas. I know that it was stupid to get drunk and I should have had better judgment, but the guys were finally starting to accept me, you know? If it makes you feel any better, I called DUnotI for a ride home."

"It doesn't," replied Lucas, but that was a lie. He hid a smile as he thought about how proud Brooke would be of the program she started. "Listen, Jamie. I don't want to be the bad guy here. But next time if you're going to be late, you call. I don't want you drinking, although I know that I can't stop you. We need to discuss a curfew, because two o'clock is way too late for a sixteen year old to be out partying, however close you are to turning seventeen." He added, before Jamie could break in again. "And, listen up now, Jamie, you never _ever_ drive drunk. You call me, or DUnotI, or someone. I would much rather get a midnight phonecall from you, Jamie, than an EMT. Understood?" Jamie looked Lucas in the eye and nodded, gently so as to not shake his already dizzy head. "Good. Now that that's cleared up, take a shower and get dressed. You stink."


	6. As We Left The Cemetery

**Thank you all for reading!!!**

In November he brought them to the cemetery. It was time. The pain, though still sharp, was less raw. Just after Keith died, Lucas could never have imagined waking up one morning and not wishing desperately to fall asleep again, to be taken away from it all. But even in his sleep, his dreams had been haunted by memories, by Keith-like ghosts begging Lucas to save him, by the echo of a gunshot in a school hallway. Now, he knew that time healed all wounds. It was cliché, to be sure, and the pain never truly went away, but it was diminished. And Lucas could wake up each morning and find strength to open his eyes and get up. He found that strength in Molly's laugh, in Rebecca's quiet intelligence, in Jamie's maturity and how protective he was of his sisters. He found it in his nieces' dark honey locks and big, innocent eyes, in the determined set of Jamie's shoulders and the way his eyes twinkled when he smiled. To him, they were Haley, the girl he had loved like a little sister, maybe more.

"You loved her, didn't you?" Jamie asked. They were standing under the oak tree by Haley's grave. Rebecca and Molly were running around nearby, not understanding the significance of the empty, gated expanse of land, with its gentle, grassy hills and weathered headstones. One day they would, Lucas knew, although he hoped for their sakes that that day didn't some too soon. Lucas turned to Jamie, a question marked on his face. "My mother," added Jamie simply, knowingly. "You loved her."

Lucas paused, nodded. A tear slipped from his eye and he brushed it away. "She was my best friend. She was so caring, so understanding, she could find the good in anybody. You remind me of her, you know." Lucas smiled sadly. "When I lost her, when she left Tree Hill with you, I knew she was trying to make her own happiness away from a place that had held so much heartbreak. But it broke my heart, too, that day. I'm not sure I ever forgave her for it. Or myself, for not telling her how much I needed her." Lucas' voice cracked as he held back his tears.

"She knew." Jamie whispered. "That you loved her, I mean. And she loved you. I could hear it in her voice when she talked about you. But it was hard for her, to remember. It still hurt her so much."

"She'd be so proud of you, J. Luke. And your father would have been too. My brother Nathan."

Jamie nodded, and when he looked up again his eyes were shining with tears. "I wish I could have known him. I loved John like a father, and I miss him so much, but seeing him with Molly and Rebecca, I just wished I could have met my real father, just once."

"He was a great basketball player," said Lucas softly, contemplatively. "And he loved the game. But his father, your grandfather, invested everything in the game. For a while, so did your father. Your mother showed him the way out. She showed him there was more to life than basketball and she showed us all the man Nathan could be. He was strong, and brave, and he would have loved you more than anything, I know it."

"He left her, though." Jamie spoke bitterly. "She never told me why, but I overheard her talking about one night on the phone. He left us."

"He was scared," murmured Lucas. "We were seventeen years old, Jamie, and he was married, a baby on the way, and the only father he'd had to look up to was Dan. So he ran. I'm not making excuses for him, Jamie, but he didn't mean it, the leaving part. Don't hold it against him. He tried to come back, in the end, but a drunk driver hit him and killed him."

"That's why you were so angry when I was drunk after that party?" Jamie mumbled.

Lucas nodded. "One of the reasons."

"I'm sorry," whispered Jamie, and he was apologizing for much more than the party.

"I'm sorry, too," answered Luke, and wrapped an arm around Jamie's broad shoulders.

"Will it ever stop hurting?" Jamie asked softly.

Lucas sighed and hugged Jamie tighter. "There will be days when you can almost forget the pain. But there will be days when the pain is so sharp you can barely breathe. It's never entirely gone, but it gets better, J. Luke. You'll be able to think about them without wanting to cry. One day you'll remember something about them, a joke they used to tell, a fond memory, a scent, and you might even smile, or laugh."

"I don't know if that day will ever come for me, Uncle Luke." His chin was high but tears ran down his face.

"It will," Luke murmured confidently. "I promise."

Jamie nodded. "I'll…" he gulped back a sob. "I'll go get the girls, give you a minute alone."

Lucas smiled sadly. "Thank you, Jamie." He watched the boy walk away, saw the resolute set of his shoulders and tenderness with which he picked up Molly and swung her around, and knew that he would be okay. That they would be okay. It had been almost thirty years since that first day with Haley on the playground. I really did love you, he whispered into the chilly November air. I loved you, too. He heard her answer on the breeze as the fallen leaves danced and twirled, but it wasn't her voice. It was Jamie's, telling him a minute ago just how much Haley had loved him, missed him. What happened to us, he asked, but an answer didn't come. It was too late for that question. There were so many could have beens, so many what ifs, and only one what was, what is.

"Uncle Lucas, Uncle Lucas!" Rebecca's eager voice cut through his thoughts. "Can we go to the playground? Jamie told me he'd teach me to do the monkeybars!"

Turning towards his nieces and nephew, Lucas smiled. "That sounds like a great idea," he replied. He clasped Rebecca's hand in his as Jamie squatted down so Molly could clamber onto his back for a piggyback ride. Together, the family of four left behind the tears, the pain, the past. Haley, John and Nathan would always have a place in their hearts but now it was time to move on. It wouldn't always be easy. There would be tears, laughter, fights and joy. There would be moments when it would seem too hard to go on, but slowly, the fractures would heal and the fond memories would outweigh the bad. They would face the future together. After all, that was what family was for.


End file.
